Refreshingly honest parenting observations to make you feel better about your parenting abilities. You're welcome.
This is a VERY important post to remind you that if you haven’t already started getting thinner/browner/sexier then it is time to START. The weather is getting warmer and your body must be PERFECT in order for you to expose any part of it. Exfoliate, moisturise and per-fect lady. It’s time to get beach body […]
Today I’m talking anal. I’m talking anal retentiveness. That kind of anal. It is a well known fact (in my household) that the more you like to control situations, the harder you find it to parent. Some people like to parent as a dictator, think Kim Jong-un, Hitler, Mugabe, Gina Ford. Some people take […]
When we play, we are more like our children than we know. Here are the universal characters that pop up at both the playgroup and the pub. The Crier Kid version- Sobbing is her middle name. So in tune with her emotions that even happy things, like fluffy bunnies and colourful rainbows, mean that tears […]
Question- Why did I leave my baby to cry? Short answer- So I could take a dump. Long answer- Shall I tell you something that is NOT helpful? It’s when you ask someone how to do something, only to be told a million ways how NOT to do it. For example: Q- How do I […]
Children are infinitely better than you. Yes, I know, they are irrational mini hooligans led by their mini ego’s and tiny tummies. But in this list, I’m gonna cut them some slack. Here is how toddlers make up in morales what they lack in stature. Until a certain age they can’t lie. Its a short […]
Ever thought about the laws that kids would pass if they had the chance? Me neither until today. I was negotiating meal time politics for the umpteenth time and it suddenly struck me that MPs (Mini People) are pretty political in their own little way. So how do their views differ from Members of Parliament? […]
So I was assembling some furniture from a well known Swedish flatpack furniture retailer we’ll call Ikea, and as I was endlessly whacking what look like tiny wooden breadsticks into holes the old adage ‘babies don’t come with a manual’ came into my head. Thing is though, what with this new fangled internet malarky, they […]
So I was going to call this post ‘how people’s bodies change’ but because it is such an individual thang I thought I would stick to what I know. Me. Plus I couldn’t cope with the thought of some ladycakes reading this 2 hours post natal and saying – ‘Not me, I just snapped […]
What makes my boobs feel full You’re on the floor Don’t know what for You’re screaming wildly and I know there is more Baby needs a feed I jump right up Being in charge of both of you is so tough Everyone else in the room can see tit And now toddler needs a poo […]
Are you preggers? I’d like to take this opportunity to introduce you to a few characters you will meet during your three trimesters (don’t say I didn’t warn you…) THE KNOW IT ALL They know the sex of your baby by the shape of your bump, can predict whether it will be early or late […]
